What was the ocean like
What was the ocean like yesterday?
So beautiful. Feeling the wind hit my face and whip my hair all around. This was truly a wonderful day. I learned that as much as I try to be the big boulder sometimes it is okay to just be the grain of sand or the seashells buried deep.
The water was just right. I didn't need to step into it. The foam and waves greeting me from my position. The tiny bubbles danced around my feet and soaked deep into the moist sand. Awaiting of making a new home inside the tiny granules.
Not once did I wince being that close to possible sharks and what not. I saw several jellyfish in and out the water. I only took note of the waves crashing in places.
I listened to the water. I listened to the wind encouraging the water to rise and hit the sand on the beach at a slow meticulous pace. Simple things I didn't really pay attention to, too much yesterday for all the chatter in my head demanded me to be blind.
Yet today after a night of good rest I can remember those warm rays of sunshine and the cold bitter wind. I can remember the sand in my shoes and my feet being toasty. I can recall how the waves crashed and the sounds of laughter and happiness. I remember how I was trying to enjoy the day but could not allow it.
I took videos. I took pictures. I walked the pier my grandfather and mother fished at in the fifties. I walked the beach and stood under the pier. I watched as the jellyfish came in to pass away. I watched the repeat attacks of the waves against the sand. I watched as the seafoam formed closely to my feet. I felt the waves crash against the posts under the pier. I felt the water soak into my shoes.
I even recall the slight laughter I had. The smirk I held across my face for a moment. I listened. I felt peace within me even under all the anxieties and worries. I felt like that was my calming.
Today I will try to hold onto those memories. I know going places with my mom won't be affected by my actions but I don't know if that would help me or hinder me. All I know is that I must pray. I must hope that I can make it.
So beautiful. Feeling the wind hit my face and whip my hair all around. This was truly a wonderful day. I learned that as much as I try to be the big boulder sometimes it is okay to just be the grain of sand or the seashells buried deep.
The water was just right. I didn't need to step into it. The foam and waves greeting me from my position. The tiny bubbles danced around my feet and soaked deep into the moist sand. Awaiting of making a new home inside the tiny granules.
Not once did I wince being that close to possible sharks and what not. I saw several jellyfish in and out the water. I only took note of the waves crashing in places.
I listened to the water. I listened to the wind encouraging the water to rise and hit the sand on the beach at a slow meticulous pace. Simple things I didn't really pay attention to, too much yesterday for all the chatter in my head demanded me to be blind.
Yet today after a night of good rest I can remember those warm rays of sunshine and the cold bitter wind. I can remember the sand in my shoes and my feet being toasty. I can recall how the waves crashed and the sounds of laughter and happiness. I remember how I was trying to enjoy the day but could not allow it.
I took videos. I took pictures. I walked the pier my grandfather and mother fished at in the fifties. I walked the beach and stood under the pier. I watched as the jellyfish came in to pass away. I watched the repeat attacks of the waves against the sand. I watched as the seafoam formed closely to my feet. I felt the waves crash against the posts under the pier. I felt the water soak into my shoes.
I even recall the slight laughter I had. The smirk I held across my face for a moment. I listened. I felt peace within me even under all the anxieties and worries. I felt like that was my calming.
Today I will try to hold onto those memories. I know going places with my mom won't be affected by my actions but I don't know if that would help me or hinder me. All I know is that I must pray. I must hope that I can make it.
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