Hoping one day words ring true
Hoping that these words ring true to all. Been hurt so many times. Too much, recently. Decades of pain shoved into me in a matter of days. The thrashing. Perhaps that is the desired affect wanted. The placing the dirt on the curb.
I need moments to myself now. I rage with echoing words. They chase the mind from memories. I don't want to listen to anyone anymore. I only hear back wash from people. It is so nasty. To be blamed for all of it. Truly. I am not the only one involved. Send them some of this, please.
People are so cruel. So hateful. Insisting they know my motives and reasons. Insinuating because of a low birth that I would only result to things such as this. Truly? Really? The matters of birth don't only cater to things as this. All measures of human life and lifestyles roll in messes such as these. As to say they even know who I am hurts worse.
For only I can defend myself. No one really knows me. Jehovah only. And to feel a repeated stab in a house of peace and calm is uncomfortable and makes me uneasy. Yet I knew I would receive some of these hits. Yet no, sir, own up to your end.
I crossed a line. I know. I gave and gave. But I now am so tired of defending, giving and living. I can't endure much longer with these attacks. Someone needs to acknowledge that I am NOT the only one. Yeah I was the one that was going to catch all so you could find "true love" but no, not anymore.
Life has a way, Jehovah has a way of opening far more than I could ever imagine. I have no more obligation to you, nor any other person. Just myself. For that I forgive all else for the one sided stories they assume to be accurate.
I am no longer in need of approval of from people. I learned that I will never be seen past the stages of great and old. Yet I don't want to grovel nor crawl. Nor walk in tiptoes for people. That isn't just how I will, can live my life now.
I have learned that the questions I have will never be answered and even if I got the straight answer, would I even be capable of listening. For I know from buzzed lips like yours I find that I would probably just laugh the night away.
Perhaps the best thing you did was loosen, unravel the bridge we built. To escape me. To live your life to the only way you know how.
I hope the experiences you gain actually teach you so severe life lessons. That one day you have to open your soul, bare it down to the spirit and watch it mean nothing. What will you learn?
Will you be strong enough to deal with anything that is negative in your surroundings? I certainly hope so. By then I will have been long gone, out of the picture. Living where I finally grow. No more brutality from all those who support you.
I will have finally gotten away from the drama you so dearly said I had. Yet ever bother to look at your stories, your circle and notice the biggest daytime drama exploded?
I need moments to myself now. I rage with echoing words. They chase the mind from memories. I don't want to listen to anyone anymore. I only hear back wash from people. It is so nasty. To be blamed for all of it. Truly. I am not the only one involved. Send them some of this, please.
People are so cruel. So hateful. Insisting they know my motives and reasons. Insinuating because of a low birth that I would only result to things such as this. Truly? Really? The matters of birth don't only cater to things as this. All measures of human life and lifestyles roll in messes such as these. As to say they even know who I am hurts worse.
For only I can defend myself. No one really knows me. Jehovah only. And to feel a repeated stab in a house of peace and calm is uncomfortable and makes me uneasy. Yet I knew I would receive some of these hits. Yet no, sir, own up to your end.
I crossed a line. I know. I gave and gave. But I now am so tired of defending, giving and living. I can't endure much longer with these attacks. Someone needs to acknowledge that I am NOT the only one. Yeah I was the one that was going to catch all so you could find "true love" but no, not anymore.
Life has a way, Jehovah has a way of opening far more than I could ever imagine. I have no more obligation to you, nor any other person. Just myself. For that I forgive all else for the one sided stories they assume to be accurate.
I am no longer in need of approval of from people. I learned that I will never be seen past the stages of great and old. Yet I don't want to grovel nor crawl. Nor walk in tiptoes for people. That isn't just how I will, can live my life now.
I have learned that the questions I have will never be answered and even if I got the straight answer, would I even be capable of listening. For I know from buzzed lips like yours I find that I would probably just laugh the night away.
Perhaps the best thing you did was loosen, unravel the bridge we built. To escape me. To live your life to the only way you know how.
I hope the experiences you gain actually teach you so severe life lessons. That one day you have to open your soul, bare it down to the spirit and watch it mean nothing. What will you learn?
Will you be strong enough to deal with anything that is negative in your surroundings? I certainly hope so. By then I will have been long gone, out of the picture. Living where I finally grow. No more brutality from all those who support you.
I will have finally gotten away from the drama you so dearly said I had. Yet ever bother to look at your stories, your circle and notice the biggest daytime drama exploded?
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