This path
I stood at the path. The crossroads. Muddy and rocky. Or that smooth green grass. My bare feet begged for the green grass. Yet my mind took the mucky mud and rocks. Not caring about the sharp cuts I would receive but I realized I needed the pain to help me forget.
Entertain my mind for just a moment. Oh possibly I can gain a hello. Oh how I dreamed to just get one. Then the rancid laughter echoes, cackles inside of me as I really am a dreamer. A hope. A fairy tale belief. Dare I ever think that could come true? No. Too far gone from the pole of people to ever be worthy of that.
Then there are more heinous laughter that rings all around me. The snide remarks that remind me I wasn't much anymore, anyhow. So to deem me that clear option, will never be opened. I already know that.
Yet. Still I dream.
One day.
Shall I sit here and weep until I gain that moment. By far no. I get nothing from it. No use waiting either. Time to carry on as though that was a break in time. The years I had to put in slow motion to see the reality.
Boy did I see it. And it hit fast.
Picking up the pieces. Now that is the hardest thing to do. Well, currently. I know I want to wait but why? Walk on my mind screams. Walk fast, in fact RUN!
Rebuild who Mary is supposed to be. Rebuild. Though I must be careful where I place my feet from now on. One step could have me toss out. Discarded like stinking garbage.
All I have to do now is have patience and grow. Learn. Then walk away with a new sense of gratitude.
Yet people will ask, did I want it to be over?
Don't ask that. I won't even ponder it. Just let all go. Walking onward with roughened soles. I will be okay. Soar and live.
Entertain my mind for just a moment. Oh possibly I can gain a hello. Oh how I dreamed to just get one. Then the rancid laughter echoes, cackles inside of me as I really am a dreamer. A hope. A fairy tale belief. Dare I ever think that could come true? No. Too far gone from the pole of people to ever be worthy of that.
Then there are more heinous laughter that rings all around me. The snide remarks that remind me I wasn't much anymore, anyhow. So to deem me that clear option, will never be opened. I already know that.
Yet. Still I dream.
One day.
Shall I sit here and weep until I gain that moment. By far no. I get nothing from it. No use waiting either. Time to carry on as though that was a break in time. The years I had to put in slow motion to see the reality.
Boy did I see it. And it hit fast.
Picking up the pieces. Now that is the hardest thing to do. Well, currently. I know I want to wait but why? Walk on my mind screams. Walk fast, in fact RUN!
Rebuild who Mary is supposed to be. Rebuild. Though I must be careful where I place my feet from now on. One step could have me toss out. Discarded like stinking garbage.
All I have to do now is have patience and grow. Learn. Then walk away with a new sense of gratitude.
Yet people will ask, did I want it to be over?
Don't ask that. I won't even ponder it. Just let all go. Walking onward with roughened soles. I will be okay. Soar and live.
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