ready to fade

I guess I am permanently sick. Now the need to cry is even harder here. I am ready to go home now. It was one thing when yes some following but now nothing. I guess that is my true punishment.

It was one thing when some allowance but now I am ready to fade. Die.

So if I was the world again its even more of a negative. I can't even focus now.

I think curling up in the ball as I dreamed what was there now reality. Its all gone. Now I can just be empty and full of tears.

and still I understand that is what I get.

perhaps that is how it has to be. forever.

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