Wing back thoughts
Curled inside a tight ball. Seated in my Queen Anne Wing back chair. Just absorbed inside the scriptures. Found that I was needed, wanted.
Looking outside I see no wind but I remember it. I feel it still. Chilling me but a warming hello. Indeed the days will be ups and downs but I will learn much about me and what Jehovah needs me to do.
Long days ahead where I will be oblivious to those around me. Looking above and beyond but standing in their presence. I will look dazed but my thoughts on the big picture will be dancing before my eyes. The details cling in the etched ways they always have. The mind collects and soaks in.
Just waiting for the next layer of the day to peel away. Then onto finding goodness.
Often times I have wanted to say so much but yet I let it all go. Standing up and staring out of the window in hopes that the burning inside of me disperses. Truly a difficult thing to experience. Yet I do.
Slowly the eyes dry up and the mind screams for attention elsewhere. A small hope that maybe words written in a hello or a good morning. And still I don't put too much concern in that it doesn't happen. Its okay. I have learned that those who WANT you in their lives make time.
When you learn who they are, the feeling of warmth overwhelms you. When you learn that nothing was forced upon them the love grows deeper. The respect is found and the trust lingers forever. Indeed a blissful event.
So yes here I am thinking way too much. Yes I want to talk to people but not really sure where I fall and I'd rather not wonder about that. Nor even be anxious in pleasing or helping them. Just need to find what is expected. Something real.
Perhaps this is "weirdness" but I can't play at being just indifferent.
Whatever it is put it where you want. I am just going to continue to expand on me. Where ever Jehovah takes me. If I land within inches of you then I understand my task.
Looking outside I see no wind but I remember it. I feel it still. Chilling me but a warming hello. Indeed the days will be ups and downs but I will learn much about me and what Jehovah needs me to do.
Long days ahead where I will be oblivious to those around me. Looking above and beyond but standing in their presence. I will look dazed but my thoughts on the big picture will be dancing before my eyes. The details cling in the etched ways they always have. The mind collects and soaks in.
Just waiting for the next layer of the day to peel away. Then onto finding goodness.
Often times I have wanted to say so much but yet I let it all go. Standing up and staring out of the window in hopes that the burning inside of me disperses. Truly a difficult thing to experience. Yet I do.
Slowly the eyes dry up and the mind screams for attention elsewhere. A small hope that maybe words written in a hello or a good morning. And still I don't put too much concern in that it doesn't happen. Its okay. I have learned that those who WANT you in their lives make time.
When you learn who they are, the feeling of warmth overwhelms you. When you learn that nothing was forced upon them the love grows deeper. The respect is found and the trust lingers forever. Indeed a blissful event.
So yes here I am thinking way too much. Yes I want to talk to people but not really sure where I fall and I'd rather not wonder about that. Nor even be anxious in pleasing or helping them. Just need to find what is expected. Something real.
Perhaps this is "weirdness" but I can't play at being just indifferent.
Whatever it is put it where you want. I am just going to continue to expand on me. Where ever Jehovah takes me. If I land within inches of you then I understand my task.
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