Reminders evidently
So many things I want to say and yet I remain shut. The numbness of knowing what I know. Just need to slow down and breathe.
Take a step back and look beyond the trees. Searching for the way to empty anything I am experiencing into the wind. Not yet ready to open my lips. Much less explain that I am NOT emotional. I'd rather that assumption than of anything else.
So the claim to my mood today is trivial and glitchy. I would rather the assumptions than to explain what has gotten me in an uproar. To show my anger to you. Never a pretty sight. So I never show that to you. Yes you can ask but I never really tell you that you have done anything wrong.
I can't tell you things like that. All I can say is I am disappointed. Not of expectations just of your actions. Not surprised but just disappointed that you could assume I am naive. Well I just sit here with a plastered smirk.
Not quite ready to go back to sleep but not ready to move either. Just numb. Figuring out where to place things in my mind. Trying to find that peace.
I have been awake for four long hours. No gumption to say hello nor to bite at anything said. Just numb.
A bit perturbed but sighing and waiting for my mind to shutdown. The world is silly. They say things and do things that others wouldn't. Evidently there are some things that need to be taught. For it will catch up and then kick the backside before you know it.
So a gentle pat of a reminder little found is more explored. Perhaps that is what needs to be retaught.
I just don't want things to be left open and harm comes to anyone especially those I love dearly like siblings. So I need to just go let all steam fall off of me and find my peaceful box inside my head. Leaning back down into the pillow and hoping sleep finds the chilly bones.
And still it does not.
Take a step back and look beyond the trees. Searching for the way to empty anything I am experiencing into the wind. Not yet ready to open my lips. Much less explain that I am NOT emotional. I'd rather that assumption than of anything else.
So the claim to my mood today is trivial and glitchy. I would rather the assumptions than to explain what has gotten me in an uproar. To show my anger to you. Never a pretty sight. So I never show that to you. Yes you can ask but I never really tell you that you have done anything wrong.
I can't tell you things like that. All I can say is I am disappointed. Not of expectations just of your actions. Not surprised but just disappointed that you could assume I am naive. Well I just sit here with a plastered smirk.
Not quite ready to go back to sleep but not ready to move either. Just numb. Figuring out where to place things in my mind. Trying to find that peace.
I have been awake for four long hours. No gumption to say hello nor to bite at anything said. Just numb.
A bit perturbed but sighing and waiting for my mind to shutdown. The world is silly. They say things and do things that others wouldn't. Evidently there are some things that need to be taught. For it will catch up and then kick the backside before you know it.
So a gentle pat of a reminder little found is more explored. Perhaps that is what needs to be retaught.
I just don't want things to be left open and harm comes to anyone especially those I love dearly like siblings. So I need to just go let all steam fall off of me and find my peaceful box inside my head. Leaning back down into the pillow and hoping sleep finds the chilly bones.
And still it does not.
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