The morning changes

It's funny when you wake up and you have so much to say yet no one but yourself to say them to. Kind of defeats the purpose but you still say them just with less words.

Ah how the mind collects the emotions inside the words. Settling down the soul and encouraging the spirit to be joyful.

Then calms the heart to not be anxious over losses that happened over the last few days. No need to cry over things that are gone. Especially those things that have been dwindling for months.

Here I am relaxing on my bed. The mixture of white and lime green. Not quite ready to extend my legs to the floor nor remove myself from the warmth.

Today is another day I am thankful for awaking. Another day I get to learn. To pray that there is no migraines or aches. For at this moment I am indifferent.

The only halt I have is the sliding of my smile to thoughts of wanting to say hello. Yet I can't .  So it kind of hurts and punches me inside.

Looking forward to a day of happiness and lightness. The day where I change many things. Accomplishing many details in my life.

I have noticed if you change yourself for the better people notice. Yet that isn't my reasoning. I am just tired of being stuck in something.

So now I push myself off this bed. Go down the hallway to the kitchen. Digest the medicines and a smoothie. Then dash for my shower. Preparing myself for a wonderful day of service.

I can't expect anything. I can't lean on my hopes. I can only dream and pray.

So today is new. With so many words to say but not many will notice my voice. That is okay, I heard.

That has to be the only goal. All else can be surprises for me.