messy day

Been a long night. Stranger things have been known to happen. My eyes are so droopy and the mind is wearing down. I pray for sleep today. Even if it is only in forms of 2 or 3 hour spurts. The soul is just worn. The waiting game began yesterday.

Taking care of mom before me was hard. Finally having to tell her about what happened was difficult. Even worse was how horrible I made her feel. Not necessarily the purpose of intention to do that but after explaining how bad I felt she felt selfish.

So I just dropped off. I didn't say anything more about my state of issues. I just focused on her. And when she fell asleep finally I cried. I just let me cry.

I couldn't say anything nor could I make myself stop letting the tears fall.

So now I am just waiting for the sleep to finally come. Yesterday was a mess. Few minutes of laughter and smiles in times of great need. But on the whole it could have been prevented. Only in the slightest of ways.

Still a piece was preventable.

Now the soul, body is completely exhausted. First wink of sleep I will be entertaining since the night prior. It is necessity to fall asleep soon. To finally relax the mind and release the tension in the brain and muscles.

So I really say thank you for those who listened to me yesterday. Greatness in listeners.

Now super cold and covers are inviting. Good morning but good night.

thank you.