Just me

Listening to my music right now. Interchanging between eighties, the blues, one republic and 90s girl hate. Its just how the mood is. Running it seems like I am doing for tonight. Yet I don't feel bad for not going to the meeting and just letting people know I am not going to any meetings.

That is where my mindset is right now. I spoke to Jehovah about it for a whole two months. Debating and then the ultimatum given to me by the brothers on Sunday. That was the answer Jehovah had given me.

Oh how I cry in gratitude. It was the GIFT I was needing. The best one actually. Right up there with the friendship I lost. But I learned. I loved and I learned. And I wouldn't trade any moments away from that friendship. No part of it could be taken off. Every second was worth having a part of my life.

Because the change. It was good.

I know I wasn't important enough. But I'd like to think for a moment or two I was once.

Anyhow. Experiences always helps us grow, learn. Such a wonderful collection of gifts received. Treasured.

Onward I decide to stop just a moment to listen to a Celine Dion song. Don't chide me for listening to it. The heart will go on. Then another one. Immortality. Then a last one. A new day has come.

Yeah such a girl.

Still it is just the push to hold the confidence I have in me.  Standing tall. Sure it brings a little bit of tears but I am happy. Laughing, smiling.

As for the friendship. One can hold onto a hope. Yet not going to pursue it. I don't even attempt. Just hope. That means I still have faith.

So. Smile with me. My choices are all positive. Every step I take is a choice I make. I learn. White horse.

Just a hope. Learning. Everyday is just me. Laughing and loving who I am. My answers are there. I am learning. Thanks to Jehovah.

I helped where I was needed. Now I am moving on. Not lost. Just loved.



And just me.

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