Just breathe
One more step I take. The exhale is displayed. The answers will unveil themselves and the hope will ring true. All I can do is pray as I have been doing.
One more step I take and I realize that I am just so rattled. So uneven is my breath. So unclear is my thought. The worst case scenarios clearly raging inside my mind.
Oh I just sit. Then I stand. Then I sit. There are no other words but confusion and anxiety. The swallowing of air into my lungs seems too hard.
Yet I know I can do it. I will make it. The worst is over. The healing is the part that comes now. Yet just to hear that as a confirmation is all I need.
The mind finds a place of silence. I can only hope that what is going on will soon be a losses memory. Yet right now I feel as though I was written into some sadistic comedy.
And even though I know I am not, I still can seem to lose the factor of all that is slapping me in the face. Thus reality is serious.
So now the only thing I can do is pace. Breathe and pace. Sit and pray. Hope and cry.
And just be patient as the time heals the wounds. Yet all I want to do is curl up and scream. Staying inside a tiny ball. Though I know that does nothing for the situation.
Just a step outside. The shifting of emotions and brisk wind. I hope clarity and coldness finds me well. Straightening my spine and stiffening the mind and heart. Becoming the rock and support I need to be.
Yet I just want to cry in someone's arms. I want someone to tell me its okay to be weak. It's okay to be scared in this moment. But all I have is me.
So my prayer is said and my perseverance is drying anything necessary. Now I just hold onto my waist and gather the grit. Holding tight and moving forward.
Life is going to be okay. Things will get better. And my time here will end. Soon finding myself back inside my bed. Warm. Comfortable. Safe.
No need to cry nor feel my emotions falling from underneath me. Just find my peace, my calm. So my mom can rely on my strength to carry her through these moments.
Oh how I hope.
Pray.
Love. Live.
Now just breathe.
One more step I take and I realize that I am just so rattled. So uneven is my breath. So unclear is my thought. The worst case scenarios clearly raging inside my mind.
Oh I just sit. Then I stand. Then I sit. There are no other words but confusion and anxiety. The swallowing of air into my lungs seems too hard.
Yet I know I can do it. I will make it. The worst is over. The healing is the part that comes now. Yet just to hear that as a confirmation is all I need.
The mind finds a place of silence. I can only hope that what is going on will soon be a losses memory. Yet right now I feel as though I was written into some sadistic comedy.
And even though I know I am not, I still can seem to lose the factor of all that is slapping me in the face. Thus reality is serious.
So now the only thing I can do is pace. Breathe and pace. Sit and pray. Hope and cry.
And just be patient as the time heals the wounds. Yet all I want to do is curl up and scream. Staying inside a tiny ball. Though I know that does nothing for the situation.
Just a step outside. The shifting of emotions and brisk wind. I hope clarity and coldness finds me well. Straightening my spine and stiffening the mind and heart. Becoming the rock and support I need to be.
Yet I just want to cry in someone's arms. I want someone to tell me its okay to be weak. It's okay to be scared in this moment. But all I have is me.
So my prayer is said and my perseverance is drying anything necessary. Now I just hold onto my waist and gather the grit. Holding tight and moving forward.
Life is going to be okay. Things will get better. And my time here will end. Soon finding myself back inside my bed. Warm. Comfortable. Safe.
No need to cry nor feel my emotions falling from underneath me. Just find my peace, my calm. So my mom can rely on my strength to carry her through these moments.
Oh how I hope.
Pray.
Love. Live.
Now just breathe.
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