Why the need to compare
To have someone try to trump everything I do whether it be drinking coffee, painting mixed media, writing, biting at me on ig or even just trying to be spiteful isn't a loving person. Sadly that is a very insecure person who is craving attention from one person. Possibly not getting exactly what is needed.
Yet I am not the one you need to try to win over. Sure I have moments where I wished I had remained friends but I couldn't compete with you. And as much as that hurt me to walk away, I did.
So if these insecurities you are harboring are affecting you deeply, you really need to speak to that main person you want forever. You need to leave me out because by far I won't be beg for a second place tender in his heart.
I won't even look for a way to interfere. Now that is on him. I won't be the cause of any woman's insecurities about him. I am not that toy he can use. Nor that weight that is pressed there.
I am just me. If you feel raw about what I do and how I speak say something. Yet I am not in his life anymore. I can't say whether I am in his thoughts or memories. Not who I am.
That is a web inside of him I don't control. I never controlled him. Sadly that is my issue in how I walked away.
To this day, yes I think if him every day. Yet I don't see myself wallowing in sorrow over my loss. No. I am going forward, living my life the best I can.
If one day I am your sister I am grateful. Yet don't dare think in the jealousy of your thoughts that I am in any way going to backtrack. The only way, ONLY way is if he begs me to be his friend again. Which in all seriousness is below him to do.
So stop trying to trump my life. You and I are not the same. But once I was a friend, lover and dreamer for him.
I am not now.
So if he wanted me back in his life he would have broken his standards and found me.
Still I don't wait for that. I am just me.
Painting. Drawing. Writing. Blogging. Making jewelry. Living. Taking photographs of nature for me. So please leave me out of your life. Stop comparing us. We are not similar.
I am by far different. No comparison.
Yet I am not the one you need to try to win over. Sure I have moments where I wished I had remained friends but I couldn't compete with you. And as much as that hurt me to walk away, I did.
So if these insecurities you are harboring are affecting you deeply, you really need to speak to that main person you want forever. You need to leave me out because by far I won't be beg for a second place tender in his heart.
I won't even look for a way to interfere. Now that is on him. I won't be the cause of any woman's insecurities about him. I am not that toy he can use. Nor that weight that is pressed there.
I am just me. If you feel raw about what I do and how I speak say something. Yet I am not in his life anymore. I can't say whether I am in his thoughts or memories. Not who I am.
That is a web inside of him I don't control. I never controlled him. Sadly that is my issue in how I walked away.
To this day, yes I think if him every day. Yet I don't see myself wallowing in sorrow over my loss. No. I am going forward, living my life the best I can.
If one day I am your sister I am grateful. Yet don't dare think in the jealousy of your thoughts that I am in any way going to backtrack. The only way, ONLY way is if he begs me to be his friend again. Which in all seriousness is below him to do.
So stop trying to trump my life. You and I are not the same. But once I was a friend, lover and dreamer for him.
I am not now.
So if he wanted me back in his life he would have broken his standards and found me.
Still I don't wait for that. I am just me.
Painting. Drawing. Writing. Blogging. Making jewelry. Living. Taking photographs of nature for me. So please leave me out of your life. Stop comparing us. We are not similar.
I am by far different. No comparison.
Comments
Post a Comment