Reoccurring

Just these moments of late have been some real eye openers. These odd moments when I know I have been here before or have stepped or even thought of something, right down to detail.

And yet I don't understand it. What even rang more truth was the sarcastic remark someone said to me. So much truth in the words that all I could do was agree and walk away.

No arguments and no bits of tears. It stung but I kept on going. What was that truth? What was the one statement that stung the breath right from me?

The man you love is with someone else.

All I can do is just walk away. Just inhale and laugh it off. Because as I was leaving the person yelled back that I was a fool for letting him get away.

Yet it's best I don't remark. It's best I just let it be. Because that is who I am. I know my place. And I would never feel any justification if I interfered with people's lives these days.

I am only going where I need to be. Forgoing what is desired because it is something I want, not need. And all that is tangibly connected will be washed away except that of my memories.

Which I can deal with.

It just stabs at me how accurate that person had to be. To read straight through me. And still I don't even bother to reattach myself anywhere.

Just no point. Especially these days. My life is one day given. Never know of the next day is a gift or not, I live as last on earth.

Though my urgency to press the truth of the matter out, I don't push it anywhere else.

Because I am happy to see happiness is floating on by for him. That is all I can hope for. And once I am away from here, all else will fall where it needs to be.

As for the been here done that moments that jeep reoccurring, I just have to live with what I know is truth. As much as I don't understand the rest.

Patience.

Joy.

Love. Oh how love exists.

Life.

And breathing.

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