Trust was there from day one, yours

   Grieving a song. Sad. A longing
to hold once more. Open eyes to realize
reality is the cruelest game.

   Oh distance I crawl to separate
from all. Carried a belief but a lie
I kept inside just to hope.

   Craved one look. Was so wrong in
thoughts. Needed the ice that built inside
to learn how to cope. The warmth only
from Jehovah. Thought I didn't deserve
any right to continue.

   Still I am walking. Still I
am learning. One time. One day.
Memories crease over lids from time to
time. Causing such a stir to my
day.

    I would have thought, then, that
is what you wanted. For me to never
to trust you ever again. Still acknowledging
the lies. How, finally, the puzzle pieces
are falling, still, into place.

   I smile saying out loud how much,
even after this all, I trust you. Yes
I realize all that was created, harm and
hurt existed. Forgiveness was given from
first day. Did you not know? Trust you still
have. Even given moments when life was
harsh, deadly. I knew your struggle.

   I am happy for your changes. Yes trust,
forgiveness and love existed all along.

    Are you relieved knowing this? I never
hated you. Just great sorrow for what happened.
How I played an act. So lost.

    We are searching, finding, holding and
hoping. One day, one day, yes, all will be
open and peaceful.

      I smile dreaming and praying of this.
Do you?