Forget sleep

    Sleep I just cannot find for myself tonight. Jumbled
mess roaming wild inside my head. Ah just relax
outside. Seated. Inhaling. All is quiet.

    Soon too will be the soul. Prepared to allow sleep
to soothe the mind. Caress the memory with a gentle
smile.

    Still seated outside somehow brings a jolt straight
to the core. Sending chills to liven up the situation.
Did I want that? No.

    And here I am hoping. La. Hoping. Hoping. Hoping.

   A dream that seems so long ago still tickles the mind
currently. A tiny ripple of laughter echoes inside
the spirit. Causing me to rise.

    The need to run overcomes me yet I am motionless
in the cooling wind. Oh how does the shivering cease
when the heartbeats roar?

    Stationary I wait upon the stairs. Oh for just a few
moment longer. The rattle of teeth invite a warmth of
pinks and white. Soft cotton to encase the paleness.
Hide the freckles until tomorrow.

   Still I hope for one glimpse. Perhaps I hope too hard
or too high. Still I can.

   Ah as the day soon comes to a close I close my eyes
long enough to have one last whisper murmured from
rosy lips. A radiant slip of memories. Names, faces
and places that send spine tickles.

   Scents in the evening play tricks on me. Almost
thought I smelled something familiar and yet I must
be dreaming. Oh how cruel it would be if experiencing
this in cynical laughter.

   Oh no no. Just absorbing the intoxicating aromas.
Ones, even if in a dream, soothe my spirit and soul
to molten lava. La.

   A dream. A place. A memory. Once. Not sad. Not
hateful. Ever so kind that I do recall. Loved all
moments even though they didn't last. Still mine to
cling to. Yes once more the smile widens.

   Holding tight to possibilities that caresses the
spirit and shine throughout the soul. Once I was held.

( I must add that this poem is not about any friend. It
is about my grandfather and the last time I spoke
to him. Yes very callous memories can be but truly
this is of my favorite person, one who I dearly miss
and hope holding that his time he will chose to listen)