Listening to
Of all the things I have learned, listening is the best key to a man's heart. No judging and no spouts of anger or confusion.
Yet where did I go? My jealousy got a hold of me. And with that I understand I could never be right for a man.
With that knowledge I am okay being myself. I don't have to get choked up because he gives his attention to others. And all other males are just people I see. No connection.
And of all the men in my life I would want to speak to my maternal grandfather the most. We had a connection. I was his girl. Műr.
I have learned to give and take but still people ask me if I will ever reconnect with a man. I always say no.
Some men have left scars and others have deepened the stain upon me. Then there are the rare handful that get me. So rare. Yet I wouldn't dare talk to them, for some are gone, resting.
But I still listen. I just don't have a voice in their lives. I am okay with that. For the noise of their emotions may damage me further. I'd rather not experience that type of turmoil again.
Can men and women be friends? Honestly, I used to answer that as a yes. But in all reality, no. There is too much that has connecting and a person can fall. Sincerely I'd rather keep to myself and talk to Jehovah all day long.
Content in my own environment. House in the country or cottage at the lake, either way, surviving on my own and relying on Jehovah.
Although I am sure, somewhere out in the world, some two friends have made it work. For me, I didn't listen well enough. I became jealous and let that kill a friendship.
But it was for the better because I cared too much and invested too much time into the ship thing. Killing myself slowly because I would never merit to be anything to my friend.
It's the best lesson.
One day I will talk to the one man I want to, my grandfather. That will be the best conversation ever. Life will carry on and all that was bad will be removed.
I look forward to listening. Since I didn't do it for some.
Yet where did I go? My jealousy got a hold of me. And with that I understand I could never be right for a man.
With that knowledge I am okay being myself. I don't have to get choked up because he gives his attention to others. And all other males are just people I see. No connection.
And of all the men in my life I would want to speak to my maternal grandfather the most. We had a connection. I was his girl. Műr.
I have learned to give and take but still people ask me if I will ever reconnect with a man. I always say no.
Some men have left scars and others have deepened the stain upon me. Then there are the rare handful that get me. So rare. Yet I wouldn't dare talk to them, for some are gone, resting.
But I still listen. I just don't have a voice in their lives. I am okay with that. For the noise of their emotions may damage me further. I'd rather not experience that type of turmoil again.
Can men and women be friends? Honestly, I used to answer that as a yes. But in all reality, no. There is too much that has connecting and a person can fall. Sincerely I'd rather keep to myself and talk to Jehovah all day long.
Content in my own environment. House in the country or cottage at the lake, either way, surviving on my own and relying on Jehovah.
Although I am sure, somewhere out in the world, some two friends have made it work. For me, I didn't listen well enough. I became jealous and let that kill a friendship.
But it was for the better because I cared too much and invested too much time into the ship thing. Killing myself slowly because I would never merit to be anything to my friend.
It's the best lesson.
One day I will talk to the one man I want to, my grandfather. That will be the best conversation ever. Life will carry on and all that was bad will be removed.
I look forward to listening. Since I didn't do it for some.
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