Questions I have
Lounging and enjoying every second of a day. I wanted to say the moment hold a lot of questions as midnight displays itself.
Longingly I would love to explore what is dancing in my mind. Wonder. Yet there is no need to even be entertained by the layers of unanswered multitude I hold. The space that I want to fill with meaning, I cannot. For I do not need.
As much as I am curious I will not even dare peek nor knock in ideas. By far each detail of life cannot be explained nor does it need to be.
Just those points that hold signicance in my life. I won't have answers and by the time an understanding is held too much will have passed. All that will remain are memories and love of life, lessons and people.
I know, to some, I wasn't enough. Yet I know I am good enough for me. And that is what matters.
So, sure, sometimes the itch to want to know puts a place in my heart. Choking out all sensibilities. Only for the reason of WHY??
Yet I can reason with myself on numerous accounts. Yet I found there is no way to truly understand a why of a person.
With that acknowledgement all that follows is how to pick yourself up and keep going. Hurt does hold you in a dark place.
And there is no rest, no peace and certainly no joy. Just lost. Hoping that someone sees the best of you in your deepest disgusting times. That is truth.
So sure I have these days too. They are outrun by the joyful, positive memories. Including those ones I made today.
That long list of questions finds air to breathe. Picking up wind just like a handkerchief in a mountain breeze. A new beginning amongst all.
And when I find those minutes or hours I just have to recall why so much is just left unsaid. How I pick up and go. Learning about all parts of me. See that is how I aim to go.
Questions I have for few and none. Words I want to say yet no one listens. That is where I am.
Yet I am not sad nor mad. Just leaving the sting on my tongue hanging to the tip, only to swallow down the words until paper catches them rattling inside me.
Longingly I would love to explore what is dancing in my mind. Wonder. Yet there is no need to even be entertained by the layers of unanswered multitude I hold. The space that I want to fill with meaning, I cannot. For I do not need.
As much as I am curious I will not even dare peek nor knock in ideas. By far each detail of life cannot be explained nor does it need to be.
Just those points that hold signicance in my life. I won't have answers and by the time an understanding is held too much will have passed. All that will remain are memories and love of life, lessons and people.
I know, to some, I wasn't enough. Yet I know I am good enough for me. And that is what matters.
So, sure, sometimes the itch to want to know puts a place in my heart. Choking out all sensibilities. Only for the reason of WHY??
Yet I can reason with myself on numerous accounts. Yet I found there is no way to truly understand a why of a person.
With that acknowledgement all that follows is how to pick yourself up and keep going. Hurt does hold you in a dark place.
And there is no rest, no peace and certainly no joy. Just lost. Hoping that someone sees the best of you in your deepest disgusting times. That is truth.
So sure I have these days too. They are outrun by the joyful, positive memories. Including those ones I made today.
That long list of questions finds air to breathe. Picking up wind just like a handkerchief in a mountain breeze. A new beginning amongst all.
And when I find those minutes or hours I just have to recall why so much is just left unsaid. How I pick up and go. Learning about all parts of me. See that is how I aim to go.
Questions I have for few and none. Words I want to say yet no one listens. That is where I am.
Yet I am not sad nor mad. Just leaving the sting on my tongue hanging to the tip, only to swallow down the words until paper catches them rattling inside me.
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