Words mean nothing

The words just have to fall somewhere. Yet they mean nothing to me today. I can't express my feelings any better than here. Yet even here I have to be careful because people read and I get approached over stupid stuff.

Last time I realized that I could not say the truth anywhere but in my mind I had to scream. Walk away. Even run. And now I learn all over that people really don't want to know how you are feeling. It is common to ask but the depth of the matter is overwhelming to them to tackle.

Its maddening just how much could affect them. So you see this is why the words mean nothing here. Yet even in some moments they do mean something but to admit that they do I have to also take on that I might offend people with the brutality of my truths. Seems to cut me either way.

So whether you read and feel moving emotions or you talk to me and feel something about what I say then I don't want to be the one to apologize for getting the dirt out of me. Just isn't fair to have to listen to backtalk when all I really wanted was just someone to thoroughly listen, unhinged.

Yet in today's world that won't ever happen.

So as I continuously say, the words mean nothing to me. I have to let people believe that. Let them stand there in hopes that this form of emptying myself is going to not harm them. Yet I will not know.

So today I say nothing. Absolutely nothing. Just write.

and all I will say is I did hurt. I was pulled down by an emotion.

That is all I will say because that is the end of it.

If you ask don't be scared by the results you may find.

And don't turn it into something.

And don't erase the friendship.

Because you did ask.

I answered.

Truthfully.

Me.