Built to keep learning, weaving

     A search for lost things. Hidden deeply in the
shadows. I didn't think that was possible to have
such severe moments, that life could take on such
nastiness and drive a wedge so deeply inside me.

    Taken forgranted the showers of wind and coolness.
Holding onto a moment just long enough to exhale all
into the air. The feeling of all worry exiting. This is
Jehovah holding, guiding and loving me.

    Silently I may break chapped lips to have the
smile crease over my splotchy red face. Was it worth
it? Every bit of stretched pain, certainly.

     Stepping over the gated, stone wall built to keep
me from learning. Did my family really think that
would stop me from pursuing all I have accepted,
gained in Truth? Seriously do they really not know
me? Or are they really scared?

    My life never has been about who I know, how
much I make. It always has been about giving. Now
it is about my spiritual growth, how much I believe
and trust in Jehovah. Why would my family not be
happy, joyous over such news, such growth?

   Ah the way I trust Jehovah to provide for me on
so many levels must truly scare my family. For they
are about money comforts. Truly I shake their
foundation as a family with my humble means. They
question, give hints on how to increase my flow of
green envy. I push it back. Astonishing them over and
over.

   Ah my dear friend I am grateful that Jehovah has
given your eyes to listen to me, your mind to show
me new ways to uplift my spirit. The ever growing
love inside this friendship and the bonds woven
deeper.

   I dare not lean upon my own understanding why
you are one of many who want to help, to listen, to
give encouragement. I gladly take and give so much
in return.

   The quirky smiles, the silly dances, the gifts of
love, the words of kindness and encouragement
how else can I be joyous in receiving? Seated here
in debate over the once more downfall of tears.
Tears of joy and happiness that you do care, you do
love and give what you can to push me forward.

    Ah how do I ask anything more of this friendship
but of a future hug and a voice to the words. Perhaps
a surprise of petals to uplift?

    Come be seated with me. Hold onto the Bible and
show me points to refer to. I am waiting.