A post of goodnight to stress.

   A countdown begins. Just a few more minutes
and the evening is mine. The apartment will be clear
of all stressful words.

   Ah just in time for me to release the layers down
to soft pink cotton upon paleness. A tiny giggle will
open up and a breath of relief exits.

   First the tension must go. Once out the door I will
shut door, releasing a huge sigh. Waiting momentarly
until taillights are in distance and go back outside
for the biggest exhale of the day.

   Still on countdown. Still patiently waiting with
a smile plastered on face. Excited? Perhaps a little
but today has been overwhelming. The stress
overtook my day and I hid among covers. Cowering
a little, treading softly as to not anger any one person.

   Now even still I await. Perhaps too much so but
to show defeat is not like me.

   Now hearing a voice speak. Soon the goodbyes
are in order. Ah the knot in my throat tightens.
Please, please Jehovah help me.

   Dear friend I ask of a thought of me. Watching the
light of the night stars picking up the red tones in
coppery strands and softness in pale leaning over
a rail. Did you see? Will you wave? Hmm. To be
announced in time.

   Short minutes seated. Almost the right time to
jump up. Being ever grateful, loving and kind. Hoping
the night proves well for this one person and that
work is less mind breaking as the lashings of today
was for me.

   Oh smiling as I watch the finale taking their places.
Coats being drawn. One last intoxicating draw of
a tar coated addiction. The breath, the fog that stinks
up most things in apartment. Soon. Soon. My heart
races for the climax of an ending. No more
eggshells to step on. No more slightly hidden laughs.
Just me.

   Hurry. Hurry ten o'clock get here.

   So much time is seven minutes. Still I am encouraged
to stay seated, demurely.  Then the rush of helping
off into the night. La.

   Dear friend if I do not see you, enjoy my joy of being
alone but not lonely. Ah today has seen much words
from me. Still a few stanzas await a voice but not until
after I breathe fresh, cold air. Feeling of it drawing
deep into my lungs.

  See you soon.