Tangible notions

Probably why I haven't slept in days is because I was lost. I try to take naps but all I get is thirty minutes here and there. Alas though that is something no one has to be concerned about.

I just lay back and stare at the ceiling or go outside looking for answers. I know they aren't there.

Parts of me are overwhelmed but I move on. The decisions to continue as being me is sometimes a very hard thing.

Yet it meant nothing. I dared to dream. I dared to be bold and yet that isn't what I was supposed to be.

Now I just have to look forward. Caring that I don't affect anyone. I know all was meant well but sometimes I wonder if any of my words meant something?

If I ever was really a friend. Just curious because I was mistaken as to what friends do for fríends. Maybe my backward ways could never really make me a true friend. Or maybe I just didn't understand.

Yet all that is wash in the river down the road. I still hope that if there ever was a tangible idea, notion I was a friend something would be said.

Next time, if there is one, you defend me. Ha.

Careful now, I cannot let bitterness well inside of me. Because I am not tortured nor scarred. Just empty. And probably I deserve that.

Okay.