One by one

One by one I delete. Soon the last and hardest will be the account we share to talk to. Then you will understand.

One by one things are deleted. Memories. Accounts in life. Soon strangers we will be just like years before.

You wonder why measures and think I am bring dramatic but you gave an ultimatum and I said I could handle it. Yet I see myself struggling to hold my stance anywhere near you and others.

One by one deleted. I don't want to fade out your life but you have already faded out of mine.

One by one the painful parts ease off of me. When you chose and said I shouldn't make you choose I understood the level you were at then.

I felt the fading already. I heard less and less. I heard I was the crazy one. I am. I know that. Yet I left behind toxic people in my life.

I still love them all and give them what they need, if I can.  But well I can cling to you for so long before the tapestry is tattered mess on the floor. All unravelled.  Me just staring. 

I can not do that anymore.

One by one people I love dearly fade from my embrace. I understand that now. I am not ready yet but when I am you will feel it too.

Hopefully missing me. Yet I am not sure if that is even possible.

One by one things, people are deleted.
Bringing forth a stronger Mary. I know I am worth it. And if I am worth anything to you, you will put effort into us.

I don't push. I don't beg. I just get up, dust myself off and continue on. Just who I am. 

You are important to me. Deeply ingrained inside of me yet I will make myself forget if I have to.

One by one I will take the memories out.