Encouragement for the brokenhearted

In Psalms 34:18 Jehovah is
with the brokenhearted ones.
Indeed it is true.

In those moments where silence
creates many thoughts. Of
whys. Of importance.  Of how to
move. Of where to go on. If
the journey traveling is even
worth time and effort.

Jehovah carries us. Helps comfort
us and gives us reason to keep
going. Only request he has is that
you listen to him.

At some times pressures and pain
are unbearable.  Some are strong
and some struggle. Neither one in
wrong when it comes to their
tolerances.

Still throw all your burdens upon
Jehovah for he will make you strong.
And don't even begin use your own
understanding of the situation. 
Lean upon Jehovah.

Still some, yes even the strong ones,
ask why and how. So much cannot be
merely understood in our minds.

Yes I must remember these moments.
My eyes swollen. My need to curl up
and forget the world. The want to
scream. The thoughts of dying over
living.  Yes I too have wondered
why I endure these pains, these parts.

I do not try to understand. I just
listen to Jehovah in efforts of
applying his words. Striving so hard
to break free of the burdens, the
worries and the weights.

In my case they may seem trivial to
someone else but to me I am struggling.
The hurt, the stabbings are not
something I know how to deal with.

Alas am I ungrateful?  No. Just
cracked. Not completely broken.
Ready to shake off the dust and keep
hoping for the goodness of what
the day holds.

Yes there are days like today where
all of what Jehovah has given me
as supports mean less and wallowing
in pity over rules.

Yes I give in to emotions today. I am
tired of how I feel. Exhaustion takes
on a new strain of tearing, testing.
Indeed the eyes appear shining but
the emotions explore lost.

The daylight has opened into the
morning. Slowly I know I must get
up. Still stinging I lay here.

Frozen of sorts. Just absorbed in
All that closes and smothered.
Yes today I need real hugs but
imaged, dreamed ones are all I will
gain.

So now I fall back to sleep. Hoping
the pain of tears slide into darkness
and I am able to go forward as
Jehovah is asking of me.

Sure each person is different. You
may have done things differently than
I have. Sure there are days I am strong
and bold.

Just not today.

Jehovah understands that. He knows
my limitations. Each day is a new
day. So no I don't worry about the
panic involved inside the next day.
Today is all I think about. Some
things not clear but I keep moving.
Even if it is very slow.

Progress is there. Every step.
Joy is found in the little moments.

Today I hope to gain one.