I am still here

    Parts of the morning has unwound into a pressing
heated sunlight that chokes me. Slowly I make all
aware to Jehovah. Asking for him to help me seek
the one second of freshness before the distance
kills the positive.

   Oh how the fact is I don't understand so many things.
So much of it I just want to run screaming. Yet I
cannot. I have much to uphold. The distances of
positivity must override anything else.

  Still the underlining is itchy and cannot be ignored
for long. Perhaps the reason Jehovah gives me the
strength to keep going forward. Dare I even want
to wander the ties are not long to go far.

  Thankful to Jehovah for that. So my weights of
empty moments, of tears I cannot pull from have to
be opened, given to Jehovah upon a prayer. Still
their is much to be said.

  I only speak to Jehovah about it for when it comes
necessary I will press the news upon another ear.
Grateful that Jehovah listens for this world is crossing
my mind with more hatred. I would rather fall back
to the Scriptures than ever let go of Jehovah's Truth.

  Yet the fact of very little association really leaves
a bad taste in my mouth. Yet I cling. I know Jehovah
will provide for his daughter, me. So those listening,
feeling will understand how I stand silently watching,
absorbing. Even a small laughter I hold, treasure.

   Ah the tears I hold back. The sniffles I pull. The
way I stand taller, all because I know Jehovah holds
me close. Ah how else can I continue when no
association exists?

  The Scriptures, the publications, the talks, the
notes and the walks in nature keep me with Jehovah.
This what makes me strong.

   So ever wonder how I am still here look up and
thank Jehovah. For certain even I don't understand
some days.

   The love of Jehovah keeps me within his flock.
For the distances I gain from others I learn to
persevere within coldness turning it to warmth. Ah
something Jehovah has taught me : loving all even
with the coldness they bear, the imperfections they
use as excuses and the hatred they press in words.

   Yes I still am here. I still know what is the most
important thing: Jehovah.

   So dear friend, is that the most important thing to
you? Your relationship with Jehovah above all else?