Some times just listening is key
I open my mouth and blood leaks through. All I can do is sigh and hope for the best. Insist on nothing is wrong and carry myself back to the bedroom in hopes that the nerves and intense pain ceases.
I would rather not cry over the event and just soak into the cool air. Yet there is no cool air and there is no soothing. I just have to imagine it right now. Hope, pray and meditate over the prospect of an early bedtime.
Still so much to do before everything is closed in for the night. Yet I have to stop. My soul cannot take it anymore. I have long days ahead of me tomorrow, Friday and especially Saturday.
Sunday will be a day of rest as well as Monday. Then the rolling begins.
But for now I just have to slow down. Sit down. Put ice packs on my head and a heating pad on the back. All in hopes that the pressure ceases and the excitement within my heart and veins settles down to modesty.
I sigh as I realize that I can't keep pushing myself. I am bound to show the wariness to those who don't know. I understand that I am a support system to some but what about my support?
Right now I am even chiding myself over certain things. Then I realize just how imperfect I am. So much of me has chronic issues. And as much as I strive to be lively I must also thrust the factor of illness is chronic.
Making myself pause to see that it is okay to be lacking in some aspects. Just allowing Jehovah that space to lift me and encourage me forward.
So here I sit on my bare floor in the bedroom, typing away and breathing heavy. In such denying recognition that I really am exhausted and an ice pack sound so delightful.
Indeed time to get up and LISTEN to my soul so my spirit can be vibrant tomorrow.
I would rather not cry over the event and just soak into the cool air. Yet there is no cool air and there is no soothing. I just have to imagine it right now. Hope, pray and meditate over the prospect of an early bedtime.
Still so much to do before everything is closed in for the night. Yet I have to stop. My soul cannot take it anymore. I have long days ahead of me tomorrow, Friday and especially Saturday.
Sunday will be a day of rest as well as Monday. Then the rolling begins.
But for now I just have to slow down. Sit down. Put ice packs on my head and a heating pad on the back. All in hopes that the pressure ceases and the excitement within my heart and veins settles down to modesty.
I sigh as I realize that I can't keep pushing myself. I am bound to show the wariness to those who don't know. I understand that I am a support system to some but what about my support?
Right now I am even chiding myself over certain things. Then I realize just how imperfect I am. So much of me has chronic issues. And as much as I strive to be lively I must also thrust the factor of illness is chronic.
Making myself pause to see that it is okay to be lacking in some aspects. Just allowing Jehovah that space to lift me and encourage me forward.
So here I sit on my bare floor in the bedroom, typing away and breathing heavy. In such denying recognition that I really am exhausted and an ice pack sound so delightful.
Indeed time to get up and LISTEN to my soul so my spirit can be vibrant tomorrow.
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