Each day is one

After you experience tragedy or immense pain from people it is almost too hard to get up and keep going. Some of the days seem though they are not meant for you.

It's funny how the way words can tumble and rape you of feelings. Just tearing you apart as a person. Yet somehow you are able to keep moving.

Not really feeling any remorse or hatred from the event just quaking from a jolt of just how important smallness is. Truly a remarkable experience in itself.

Trembling in moments where life pushed so hard. Making you fall, hitting dirt bottom. Yet to see the joy of being capable of standing back, standing tall. Makes the joy inside of yourself soar to unlimited heights.

Indeed how I felt through my rough patches in the last few months. My only regret is not speaking up sooner. Knowing all that I had learned, just trying to let it go. To continue on into my quest for love and understanding. Trying the best I could to have peace. Yet being shaken for all I am.

Yielding to those who were raping my integrity. The need for them to destroy character, respect. Yet I was letting it happen.

Dare to try for peace. Hoping that love would continue to overpower me. Loving them and holding onto my understanding of their rough edges. Oh I am grateful Jehovah pressed me to believe that.

Finally at the breaking point, letting Jehovah finally take the reins to this mass mess. Give in to my trust in him and show I am willing to be his child.

Only to see vibrant colors explode inside of me. Granting me the calm I asked, prayed for.

In a bubble I was. Nicely protected. Finding that only the smallness I saught was found. Opening my mind to every day as being completed.

Every morning my eyes open I look for what Jehovah gives me. My breath. My steps. The sunlight. The breeze. I am here.

One day at a time now. The worries of life don't weigh on me. Stress that were stained on my mind and skin no longer scar me. My sighs are no longer escapes. They hold a release of a breath. That is all.

Today? Today is not over yet. And the biggest yet smallest part of my day was talking to you.

Surprisingly it is the highlight of every day. All else are just bonuses I gain.