Perhaps, maybe, yes

      Oppressed are the emotions.  Clarity
checked once and twice. Emptying
all that is necessary into thin air.

     Perhaps some listen. Perhaps some
just sigh. Perhaps some just ignore. Alas
I do not question.

     I must remember me. The words I
hear. The scenes I see and recall.
That has to be enough. Tight air
chokes but all for the right reasons.

     No longer do I suppress the hopes.
Daring me to lean into the wall, be
silent you say. NO! I must demand
my hopes, my dreams.

     The voice I hold here, well screams
who I am. You don't have to love me
nor do you have to pretend to care.
I read well. I understand much.

    I stand on weak knees but I am
standing. Head not quite thrust
upwards but the thought of a firm
dream is placed high. A hope of
reaching is all possibilities.

    So sure I felt the weight of loss.
I feel the distance wedging but one
day it will be closed.

     One more day I get to inhale. One
more day I get to cling to the hands
that love me. One more day of given
delight in a rainbow. Indeed one more
time I hold a smile of joy for only
a few.

     Sure I sound reclusive. Sure I am
observed as over thinking. Sure my
emotions tend to linger on my sleeves.
Sure I am weak and tearful in moments
of strength.

     Yet once did you ask the joy I
search for? Do you know?  Do you hope
to forget? Perhaps. Maybe. Yes.

     Indeed I climb higher and higher.
Soaring in the cold winter wind. Of
course I will never be near, not really
be allowed anything but a sighing
smile.  Yet it is mine.

     Tear me down. Laugh at me,  if
you will. Kill the dream I hold dear
but don't you dare rip from me the
hope I carry of friendships.

     Perhaps you think necessity
needs to be pristine.  Sorry life isn't
perfect nor am I . Far far down the
road somewhere in the back of your
head a memory triggers you. Then
you see me with a smile,  the hope.

    There I am not blind.  Not over
thinking. There I am true. Is that
what scares the lines of frozen
words from your own mind?

   Perhaps. Maybe.  Yes.