My lifetime goal

Sometimes the feelings of a lost child wandering is me. Soon, then I realize it was not the lost emotion but the left out one. Only to blame is myself for sure.
Carefully I take the precautions for not being in such a situation. I realize that I must be a bit off or stand offish just so I can be me. To form completely to everyone's liking can bring great harm to me. Indeed I am not self centered. By far I care too much for others to even focus on me.
Still there are moments I completely wash myself out of the picture. Yes that is sad but still the truth. Do I fear that I am worth nothing? Oh no. I know I am worth the same as those two coins dropped than the other forced riches.
Interestingly I find that my efforts to help are great. The need to see others happy is my lifetime goal. Perhaps a silly conquest but certainly one filled with love, joy and compassion.
I could not ask for more than that in return. Yet I also realize persecution will be near too. Yet I am capable of enduring. Ah so much indeed.
This I wonder of many times in the moments of loneliness. The concern of defeat and then I am given a new thread from Jehovah showing, leading me the way onwards. So loving, so joyous are these tiny pushes of love. Then the hollow memory passes and I pursue what is important in life.
The caring. The love. The need to see people smile. Silly perhaps but my answer to any low moment I have. Just to see bit of joyous glow on others. My gift to Jehovah. My best.