Maybe I misunderstand, but there is no opening

           I am tired of words. Actions speak louder and yet
some never proceed. Irony at its best. Bitter I have
been labelled. As far as truth holds grit, I am standing
strong for the hope.

          Alas I laugh when the promise of words ring
before my eyes and wayward awkward moments of
waiting begin. Indeed the laughter of coldness
chills deep within.

          The variables of emotions rage and I become
silent. Indeed breathing in brisk air to comfort. Indeed
the ringing plays.

         The strands of copper brush against small
rivers of puffy cheeks. Alas to admit I waited
is a silencing, sickening defiance. Ah ha the gathered
words recouping in their apologetic ways. The hopes
to break me of a distasteful banter "Mary Moment".

        How horrid is the one proclaiming when strength
to stand, enduring is not their own challenge? How is
it I need to explain myself in my misunderstanding of
a hope?

        Daresay I be vibrant in my emotions much less
my expectations? Oh then I am selfish, egotistical
or jealous. Ah ha how right, far from truth that is?

        Indeed I waited. Patiently and now I am tired.
I tried to be understanding of imperfections yet
my experiences of broken words is not a memory I
like to recall favorably.

        So dare you wish, you want to say I am involving
an emotional rollercoaster of "Mary Moment" with
you, I laugh.

         I don't see it on your side because there is no
opening to view. I only get to guess at best, then be
blamed for assuming. How, now, is that fair when the
opposition was not my fault. I was not privileged to
gain insight.

        Hearsay is all I can accumulate and with that
I rather ignore. I have had my rounds of induced
tidbits of window shopping but sometimes the welcoming,
open door is so much more appealing.

        So excuse my "bitterness" when the label of
whiny comes to echo in your mind. For that matter
when sarcasm quakes. I tire of words.

       Actions. Involvement prove to be more rewarding,
so I have grown accustomed to understanding.